An open letter to my patrons, Since opening my pub years ago, I have tried my best to stick with tradition. I have not added big screen televisions nor have I changed my beer selection with all those new fancy-foofy bottles of rubbish. And if anyone's noticed, I still even have a jukebox that plays actual CDs that were suggested by you the customer! Not the soulless digital music systems the new sports bar has. And up until now, I have offered traditional camel hair dartboards with real darts.
Unfortunately, during the last tournament, a couple of our better-known regulars (I'll not name names – Goddard) had a few too many pints and just about pinned another customer's head to the wall with a few wayward darts. To remedy this situation and to add a bit more excitement to our tourneys, I have purchased two Arachnid Commercial Dartboards. These machines use the soft tip darts, but are extremely accurate and are actually fun to play. This may also eliminate some of the fisticuffs over hand scoring as it also keeps track of scores, missed darts, handicaps, and every other tournament statistic.
So the camel hair dartboard now has a 3-pint maximum and is not to be used for tournaments. Sorry for the inconvenience, but I think everyone will appreciate the advantages of the new Arachnid dartboards and feel safer knowing they are no longer subject to beer-soaked projectiles. Though I'm sure someone will still stand a chance of losing an eye if not careful.
Cheers.